Why can’t I keep it straight

Dear Jesus,

I have read bible and the lives of those who you called on to save Israel or reign as kings.  David had many wives, committed adultery and murdered the husband thinking he could hide his sin.  Solomon had a thousand wives and three hundred concubines.  Gideon, Samson, and others who did a lot of acts to cause Israel to return to God had multiple wives.  All had multiple wives.

And then the New Testament dispensation began.  It was now exposed as a sin to desire more than one woman.  It has been wrong all along but now it was out in the open when You taught about it when You were here.  It was intended all along for one man to have one woman, since the garden before the fall.  And we screwed it up.  And now I am screwing up.

I don’t understand why I cannot be delivered.  I hear about so many other people who have been delivered from sinful habits.  One is delivered from alcohol, another from drugs, another from smoking cigarettes, another from bad dreams that caused problems when awake, I don’t know I cannot overcome what plagues me, what has plagued me since my childhood.  Will You one day please take away what causes me to stumble and fall?

Grieved,

Mike

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