Dear Jesus,

Do I truly understand you?  Do I really know you?  I am really confused and paralyzed in coming to a complete understanding of what my relationship with you should really be.  What is the true nature of my relationship with you?  The Holy Spirit is living within me, your Spirit promised to your disciples who descended upon the assembly at Peter’s first sermon on Pentecost.  The Spirit is within me but I truly need to understand His role.

I know that you speak to us through your written word, but is there any circumstance where the Spirit may prompt us or let it be known to us in an immediate situation as to what to do?  You assure your disciples to not worry for the words they will need to say will be provided to them in their time of need.  I don’t know.

I suppose I want to be instructed in a personal manner that is not orthodox.  I want to believe that there is a distinct voice of the Holy Spirit that I can discern from other noise.  I want to believe that when William Carey or Eric Liddle went to become missionaries to India and China that the choice of destination was something you passed on to them through the Holy Spirit and not just a toss of the dart at a global map. 

I want to remain true to your word, the bible.  I don’t want to search for something that inconsistent or unbiblical or heretical or theologically unsound or just simply wrong in the light of your truth.  Please, be a lamp unto my feet and light my path so that I may understand your will for me.

Your obedient servant,


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